Tuesday, May 19, 2009

A more current picture of me!!


** Several people have commented that I look young to have grown children plus grandchildren!! But as I stated in a reply to one of the comments, the picture I chose for my profile pic was the only one I was not too embarrassed to post and I needed something quick for my blog. That picture was actually several years ago and at a very happy time in my life. I've sinced gained alot of weight due to some health issues and I've lost alot of hair as well (and of course, I've grayed some too!!! What do you do for natural red hair that's graying??) So I don't let anyone take pictures of me very much and if they do, I pretty much try to hide them.


** But I didn't want to seem dishonest because that's not my intention - I actually DO still look exactly the same EXCEPT for the weight gain and thinner hair!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I'm posting a more current picture of me - actually last year. That day, I had tried straightening my 'naturally kinky' hair with the big fat curling iron and you see how it turned out. I kind of liked it but once I stepped outside in the humid Mississippi air, it frizzed right up!!! So I don't straighten it much - just let it be natural and curly. And I guess I couldn't conjure up a smile for anything!!
** I want to lose weight so badly and actually started Nutri-system last year. It was wonderful, I enjoyed the food and I honestly stuck to it. I didn't cheat AT ALL. The first month, I lost 15 pounds, the second month, I lost 12 pounds. Then it got to be too expensive with me still having to buy groceries and cook for my hungry family!! I had to make the hard choice to cut out spending somewhere and it had to be there. I was so disappointed because it was the only thing I had every tried that actually worked for me. I was doing it with a buddy and that made it even better.
** It is SO HARD to lose weight the old way - limit your portions, stay away from sweets, fried foods, processed foods and sodas, increase water and walk 100 miles every day!! I've even tried to sweet talk my hematologist into some popular weight loss pills, and he let me know real quick that due to my health issues, I was crazy for even asking or considering!! Then he proceeded to break down a meal plan for me and showed me some exercises to do and just thought that I would whip out a magic stick and cast a spell on myself!!! At that point, that's what I thought it would take to get me to stick to it and lose weight that way. I know it takes will power and determination and I haven't had that. The 'want to' is there but no 'get up and go' about it. So it's my fault.
** But it's been 'weighing' (no pun intended!!) heavily on my mind for a couple of weeks that I really do need to suck it up and get on a good diet and exercise plan and get this weight off of me. For my health and for me. I want to feel better physically and feel better about myself. I want to be IN PICTURES with my family, not just always TAKING them.
** Ok, well that's off my chest and you can see what I look like now!!! I think I'll leave my profile pic up for encouragement to myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm still 'happy'. I have a wonderful life and a precious family whom I adore - I just don't smile as much BECAUSE of how I feel about MYSELF. But that's all about to change!! Time to stop being so negative about jennifer and do something to change what I CAN change. The age doesn't bother me at all. I'm proud to be 43 - don't even mind the gray hair (just want to KEEP it all!!) I just NEED to lose weight and get healthy again. And I'm GOING to do it! Whisper a prayer for me??!!
I plan to post some artwork tomorrow night if I make it in from work at a decent time. I got inspired by some beautiful pictures in a 'Southern Accents' magazine that I saw at my Doctor's Appointment today and even sketched out how I wanted to do it!! Remember, I don't go anywhere without my Idea Book and a notebook/pen!!
** Well, if you stuck with me through to the end here, thanks for listening!!! Just got started and didn't know when to quit, I guess!!
** Until tomorrow,
Jenn


5 comments:

  1. You hang in there Jennifer! I have battled my weight all my life, and know EXACTLY how you feel about needing to lose weight, be more active, and get healthy.

    I have "let myself go" and have begun to get myself back on track. But, as you said, it is NOT easy at all. I just try to remind myself that good things in life are not given to me, I have to work really hard for them!

    Saying a prayer for you, would also love for you to say a prayer for me! Hugs!

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  2. Still think you look beautiful inside and out. Just decided myself that I am not going to be embarrassed by my pictures, it feels great not to worry. As for gray hair I think I have earned them all, but clairol isn't my favorite product because of its name...I have been slowly taking weight off with a juice I was introduced by a friend. It has really helped give my confidence a boost.As woman we are so hard on ourselves. We are perfect just the way we are!

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  3. Jennifer,
    You are a BEAUTIFUL woman! Please don't be so hard on yourself. We as women, tend to be very critical of ourselves. I think it is time we relax and enjoy ourselves. I find in my later years in life (now 55) I too, have a weight problem. When I was much younger I was always thin, as in very thin! Big difference as to what I am now (about 170 pounds)! Ouch! LOL. I have had some medical problems that have contributed to my weight gain, but now I should be able to exercise (instead of sitting on my butt here at the computer).
    I will also be praying for you and Tammy and Dawn. God gives us the strength to do what we need to do, all we need to do is ask Him!

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  4. Jennifer...I am going to repeat what has already been said...you ARE a beautiful woman! Always remember that! I think all women have that tendency to think of themselves last because our families always come first therefore, we tend to let ourselves fall apart in some ways. Just remember though, women ARE the stronger gender regardless of how men view us. Can you imagine them going through what we do all through our lives? I don't think so!
    I wish you luck with your weight loss. It is a tough battle but it is best for your health. I found out a few years ago that I had an underactive thyroid and that was my weight issue. Although I am not skinny any more as I used to be, I'm thinking that my thyroid meds keep my weight in check for me along with watching what I eat and walking for exercise so ask your doctor to have your thyroid numbers checked. Ya never know!
    ~Carol

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  5. Thanks to all of you sweet women for your thoughtful comments! You've really lifted my spirits and put a smile on my face! God bless each of you!
    Jenn

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